As a business mindset coach and rapid transformational therapist Cyrina is passionate about helping business owners understand how to navigate growth. Their business is leading them to a place that is amazing, but also unfamiliar. Her work focuses on mindset and becoming confident to step into the next level, bringing you scientifically proven techniques to get your subconscious on board so you have 100% of your mind working with you and for you, no longer working against you.
Why don't you share a little bit about how our subconscious affects our business?
So the main thing to understand is that science can hook up things to our brains and measure them. I think there's a lot of misconceptions about your subconscious that it’s this deep dark place or whatnot, but it's our autopilot, it's our programming, and what happens is there's a state they can measure brainwaves. So there's a state that we're living in, between the age of birth and 10, where that's all getting programmed. Then around 12, you start being able to think abstract and more logically, and all that kind of stuff. So that programming is set, and then it's running and a lot of times the way we were raised, the experiences we had, the beliefs about money, the beliefs about relationships, and success, and all those kinds of things are in contrast to the direction we want our business to go. We might have grown up learning that rich people are snobs or greedy, or we don't want to be like those people, or money is evil. You might not notice them until then, and as a business owner, we have to show up more, we have to put ourselves out there, we have to accept more money, we have to raise our prices, we have to sell. So all those things, if there's anything in your past that goes against where you're headed in your business, it's going to mess with you. So it's affecting business owners anytime you're struggling to take the action that you want to take and I think it's something inherent in all of us as well, this idea to put yourself out there and selling your product and service. That takes a lot of belief in ourselves and there's not a ton of people that had the ideal growing up experience where you didn't hit any bumps in the road that knock that down and take your confidence and have at least a couple of beliefs that go against how you need to show up in your business.
What is one way to change a limiting belief?
To me, the number one thing is knowing that we can change. Old science was like, Oh, well, you're wet cement before age 10 and you're getting imprinted or whatever and then you're just stuck. I think a lot of the belief to overcome is like, "Oh, I just don't do that, I can't do that, that's just not my personality." But when you know, any challenge that you're coming up against, you can change. To me, that's the most powerful one. But it's awareness, it's knowing, okay, I raised my prices and I'm procrastinating, I'm not taking action to let anybody know, maybe there's something here. That process of self-reflection and awareness is a huge step. I have people get out a piece of paper, write anything that they're struggling with, and ask why am I not showing up? Why am I afraid to raise my prices? Why am I freaking out and procrastinating about this? Just that process of asking that question and listening is crucial because our consciousness is just thinking, thinking all day long, your heartbeats and your lungs breathe, and your mind thinks. But if you write down a question on a piece of paper, you ask yourself a question, and you listen, then you're automatically in that different state, instead of just like this constant diatribe from your brain, of all the things, you just kind of get quiet and listen and see what comes up.
How is this different than positive thinking? Because that's another avenue that I see is just to remain positive to have a positive mindset, but this seems like it's a different approach.
It's funny because your subconscious runs around 95% of your brain. So if in your conscious, you're going, I'm successful, I'm amazing. I'm a millionaire. And you have a subconscious belief, it's going to kind of be like, Yeah, no, whatever. So it's understanding that to make lasting changes, you've got to get that subconscious on board. If you're saying these things to yourself in front of the mirror, a lot of people like the affirmations and these kinds of things, and there's a part of you that's arguing with it. Again, it's really important to listen to the part that's arguing and figuring out okay, what's that belief. That's why a lot of times the affirmations and the things we do in our conscious, don't work as well, because it's only 3% or 5% of our mind. Now, a lot of things you can look in the mirror and say, I'm wonderful, and I'm good and if there's no argument, if there's no part of your mind going, "Yeah, whatever, you're full of crap," then you're good. But if that comes up and you're finding yourself saying them and getting nowhere, that's when you know, there's something going on that's deeper that needs addressing.
Can you share with our listeners, one of your favorite networking experiences that you've had?
Yeah, so I lived for the past 20 years and Central Wisconsin a couple of hours north of Milwaukee, and moved down here, August of 2019. When I still lived in Central Wisconsin, I had just started my business three years ago, and I was looking for Facebook Groups and I googled, "women helping women in Wisconsin," and "women, Wisconsin entrepreneurs," I just googled it in the Facebook search to see what was there. I found Melissa Blair's group, Wisconsin Women Helping Women Entrepreneurs. So as part of that group already, when I was moving down here, I was like, "Okay, I'm going to just make a post and ask, I need an office, I'm going to look for an office," and someone responded right away. I had we lived down here, I think just a couple of weeks, and I met with a woman named Sarah Feldman. We ended up talking in her office for at least an hour and I told her my whole story. She was really generous with her time and she's like, "Okay, I'm having a women's event in a month, and I want you to be on the panel," And I was like, "Okay, that sounds great!" So it was and it was a fabulous event. She's like, "Let's just cut through the bull, and have women entrepreneurs really talk about it and their struggles and, be open about it." It was a really cool event, you had some amazing speakers. Then at that event, I met Todd Reed, who since then have collaborated and connected with their community. Their networking community is phenomenal, the people are awesome and that was just from a random Facebook post looking for an office.
How do you stay in front of and best nurture the network and community that you've created?
It's a love-hate relationship with Facebook because this is where a lot of them live. I kind of ebb and flow like I'm on a good amount and then I go over to way too much and then I pull back. But what I try to do in groups is answer questions, share recommendations, share any free content that I have, videos that I make, or podcasts. My main thing is helping people overcome anxiety. So whatever those limiting beliefs are, they show up most of the time and anxiety and overwhelm and so explaining to people grab a piece of paper, start asking questions. You can do that for free right now and you may be surprised what comes up when you just have that conversation. Those kinds of things like sharing whatever info that I'm that I have, that may be helpful really helps, just giving.
What advice would you have for that business professional who's looking to grow their network?
I think the biggest thing is to show up. Put a post, ask a question, speak up, share. I've heard from a lot of people and I've certainly experienced this myself, where you walk into the room, and you feel like you don’t belong. I think it's having that belief that I do belong here, people want to hear what I have to say, I have something to contribute, I have something to give and walking into it like that like we're all equals, and realizing I'm probably not the only one that's a little nervous right now changes everything. I know in my own life, saying people want to hear what I have to say is a really powerful statement. Again, coming into the networking group space with that, what can I give here, how can I serve here attitude allows people to tell that you're there to give.
If you could go back to your 20-year-old self, what would you tell yourself to do more or less of or differently with regards to your professional career?
The main thing for me, in my 20s I was just trying so hard to be a success and get people's approval and prove my worth. So the main thing I would say is "Sweetie, you are good, you're valuable, you're worthy, you're enough just the way you are," and instead of trying to earn the worth, get the worth first, then do your business, it'll be a lot more fun. Work on your self-worth, then you're gonna be able to do your business with a whole different healthy way of operating.
We've all heard of the six degrees of separation. Who is someone that you'd love to connect with and do you think you could do it within the sixth degree?
So I have a four-day-old relationship with a person that I've seen on YouTube that I greatly respect. His name is Dr. Greg Carr. So the YouTube channel is called In Class with Carr and he's like this history Encyclopedia. So when I work with my clients, I empower them with knowledge, right? Like even the conversation we had, is it normal to do this? Yes. When you know it's normal to behave the way you're behaving, you have tons less stress because you don't think you're insane. So to me, he's providing that knowledge around our current political environment going, "Hey guys, here's the deal, here's the history," and just providing so much knowledge that for me is taking my anxiety away. He's in DC and my brothers in Virginia Beach so I feel like my brother might know someone who knows someone in DC. Then there's another networking group that I'm part of called polka dot powerhouse. I would guess, if I said the Facebook page, "Hey, I'm looking to connect with someone, he's at Howard University in DC, does anybody know anybody there?" I bet I could at least get a good start there.
What any final words of advice to our listeners around the topic of growing and supporting your network?
Just show up, share your gifts, and set that intention. I'm here to meet people and serve. Trust that sales are going to happen, you don't need to worry about that and, always having that intention of giving. Lastly, just have fun!
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